Why? Parents Why?


The good times

First time in months i wake up to a Saturday without a wedding, party, house chores or any “necessary paroles”and thought to myself  that i was gonna rest and use the day to recharge batteries after weeks of endless work(i am unemployed by the way) but you get my drift…

Alas! No wedding and party and paroles also applied to my parents too and there i was, stuck home with my parents for an entire Saturday(Now i miss the EPL, La Liga, and to patronize my country Africa Magic *cringe*)…

7.42a.m I see the PING!!!! on my phone and yes its my mum who says “what are your runs today like?” I say “i want to chill and rest at home” and she says”  ose omo mi, i need you to go to surulere, and then goes on and on to give me a number of errands….O_o

My mum starts with a tonne of Yoruba prayers: wa ri omo toju re, wa bi ibeji ma wa ba e to won dagba, wa dagba dada wa de ri ise ti olorun fe fun e(for translation find a local yoruba lady :D) before she goes on to ask you and i can’t just say NO. i actually find it funny now that i write about it.

There are times we all just want to be alone and just have the smell of our rooms and our thoughts to ourselves but in my house this one is NOT possible. My folks must just have an errand to send you on, dont get me wrong i LOOOOVE my folks but at times its just not ideal..

But why are many Nigerian parents like this?

I know in Nigeria we are brought up to respect not just parents but adults in general, but sometimes doesnt it just go too far? Why is it hard for “many” Nigerian parents to just give children space and not always feel the need to encroach all the time.

The minute we just speak out and ask for a little break, you get that “talk” about being very ungrateful and only do stuff for them when you need something? you don’t get it?? Errr ok……. sure you don’t? *sigh* Never mind. Maybe its just me.

A couple of weeks ago, i was out with my friends and we spent 3hours talking about our parents and i noticed from them that nigerian parents feel a need to be in control and monitoring all your movements despite the fact we are in our very own rights adults.

Try Dialogging at times and you are said to be rude as we don’t talk back to parents.

How are we to share our views if we cant talk with them?

How are we to go on telling them “stuff” when they listen but still feel their way is the right one?

I can go on and on but #pause.

I am sure our parents always thought they were going to be the dream parents, and i am certain many of us have said things like this “i wont be like my dad/mum, i am going to be a happening dad/mum and my kids will like me” but i am certain that till you get your own kids you just never quite know how it’s going to turn out, right?

My last Post was rather long so i will stop here and allow y’all to give tales (good&bad) about how you fare with your own parents.

P.S this is not a rant. 😀

Cheers.

*sigh*

 

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16 responses to “Why? Parents Why?

  1. LOL.. Nice write-up. Just for the record, some of us who say we’ll become “happening parents” really will. *coughs*

  2. We all can agree our parents mean well for us and we do mean well for ourselves…the parent/adult child problem IMO arises from both paries failing to have adequate understanding of the other. They probably dont believe we can balance things up(fun and seriousness) and we think they are over-stressing the ‘seriousness’ thing. All I can advice is talk to them about ur long/short term plans(to show u know what u’re doing,it works) or manage till u’re of age to hold ur own( career wise,crib n the good things of life) then both sides become happy and they can say ‘Here’s my son/daughter in whom am well pleased lol

  3. Hey!
    I see you mehn! I see you clearly!

    My parents? They’re cool when they are, but when they’re not? That’s a story for another day!

    To be honest? I’m not even sure what kind of parent I would be yet. I respect parents a lot, it’s not an easy job.

    • exactly not an easy job at all so as much as i might like to have my parents chill a bit…. i have to accept that its the toughest job in the world

  4. Femi you wont Kill Us oh…..
    i can relate but me i love your folks so i dunno what you are on about sha… LOL parents will always be parents

  5. I completely agree. When you live with your parents, are unmarried, and have no children, they have a very hard time seeing you as an adult. I have heard that it will never end until you have your own family because until then they believe that they should be your only priority.

  6. Parents usually judge/teach their children based on the experiences they had in their own time, so i think the same will go for us too eventually i.e. it will be based mostly on our soon-to-be-phased-out tech culture…..

    So errm peace \/

  7. I agree to a certain extent. But that is just my point of view. My parents are the exact same way. Sending you for errands when you don’t feel like (to be honest, when do you ever want to go on errands lol). But in all honesty, my parents are also sensitive to my feelings if i want to be alone. Plus, i can converse freely with my parents. The only time it may ‘seem’ disrespectful is if both parties start a shouting match x_x (if they shout, i shut up lol) hahaha.

  8. I totally relate to this. Its like you penned down my thoughts. I dnt get why parents preach independence and yet they get all up in your business.
    I have mega love for my folks but I wish they could jez cut us some slack.

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